No, not Erotica. I’m taking about the neuroses that plague writers. For the longest time I thought I was alone in being completely neurotic about anything and everything to do with writing, editing, publishing, conventions, etc. But after numerous conversations with other writers, I’m discovering that many (if not all?) writers have them.
You must have The Perfect Pen in The Perfect Color for edits.
No other living creature can be within a half mile radius of you when you’re writing.
You must have The Perfect Music.
You must have absolutely No Music.
The publisher is merely humoring you.
Your novel is complete and utter crap, and one of these days, everyone is going to notice. Most likely all at the same time.
Nobody really wants to hang out with you at conventions/conferences/events. They are all merely tolerating your presence out of pity and incredible kindness.
Your editor/agent whimpers and cringes a little every time they sees an email from you in their inbox. They also wonder how soon you can be legally ditched.
The people who have given lovely blurbs for your book have, again, done so only out of pity and kindness.
The people who have not yet given you feedback on your book, even though it as been THREE WHOLE DAYS since you sent it to them, actually have read it already and hate it thoroughly, and are trying to figure out how best to tell you that it sucks rocks.
Or, for the readers:
Absolutely no first person.
Absolutely no third person.
Absolutely only second person stories told in present tense.
So, what are your writing or reading neuroses?